Holiday Advice I Wish I’d Had Years Ago

Welcome to YTF Community, a place to safely share in the challenges and joys of feeding our families. And make all of it easier! This is a weekly members post with timely advice and encouragement as we head into a busy holiday stretch. I hope you find it useful, and that it lightens your mental load a little.

I know everyone keeps saying this, but I really am having a hard time believing that Christmas is next week. For me, it’s partly due to my week-on week-off custody schedule, but also this month just flew.

And because I know we all may feel some varying degrees of overwhelm, I want to share a few things helping me to feel more present and able to handle all of the logistics coming up this week. I am focusing on these reminders in particular this year since they are the ones I have realized I wish I had known in past years.

The first one helps me worry less about what my kids eat (and don’t) eat. The second helps me ensure that my needs don’t become invisible in the chaos (which can happen so easily to moms). And the third is a streamlined holiday menu with a bonus recipe for the easiest, yummy main dish ever that ensures I am not stressed in the kitchen. (A real win on holidays!)

Note to remind you that as a member, you have access to the full library of bonus posts. As well as a weekly meal plan you can customize and adjust for your unique family.

1. What My Kids Eat Does Not Define My Worth as a Parent

With holiday dinners and events come more opportunities for other people to notice, comment on, and possibly make us feel badly about what our kids eat…and don’t eat. Which means that I am doing my best to remind myself—starting right now—that people can have opinions, but I am not going to allow them to make me feel like a failure.

Or make me feel like my kid is a failure for eating differently than someone expects them to.

I know this can be so hard to do in the moment, but on days (and during weeks) when we’re out of our usual routine, try to remember that it’s 100% normal for intake to be different for kids. (And honestly, adults, too.) Which could look like relying on more frozen foods because cooking from scratch is more than we can handle. Leaning on Snack Dinners because we were out of the house all day. Or letting the fact that a child just crackers at a holiday party be exactly what it is—a simple choice based on hunger and the overall context in that moment.

On days when there is more less familiar food, it’s normal that the kids may appear to be “pickier”. Or for them to actually be more selective with what they eat. But the context the child is in is also less familiar, which can throw a lot of kids off. This is not a problem to necessarily solve, though you could try to ensure there is a food your child usually likes on offer. Our appetites and preferences vary. It’s normal that they vary on holidays, too!

Sure, it would be easier if every kid just ate whatever they were offered, but that is just not how it works in reality. So it’s up to us to keep the broader context of intake in mind during holidays so we remember why a child may have more of a challenge eating—and then to stand up for our kids if a comment is made in front of them or directly to them. A simple “He’s fine, I trust him” can go a long way towards reassuring a child that they, too, are okay.

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