Tired of hearing “fine” when you ask about your child’s day? These 45 creative after-school questions help spark real conversations with kids. Build connection, encourage sharing, and make talking fun with these parent-approved prompts!
Are you struggling to get your child to talk to you after school? It can be hard to think of open-ended questions. Get 45 questions here!
My son always had a super talent. He could answer any open-ended question with one word, and do it well. He has sharpened my skills as a question-asker.
As your child comes home from school or whatever activity he/she has been at, you want to know the important details! You want to know what your child liked and what she didn’t. You want to your child to know you are interested in his life. You want your child to know she can talk to you about things and that you will listen. It can be hard to know what questions to ask, and over time, it all becomes more second nature, but in case you are struggling, here is a list of specific questions to get the conversation rolling.
Talking helps build your relationship with your child and helps them to develop an emotional awareness. I will caution you to NOT sit down and pepper them with questions as soon as they get home from school. Your child might need time to wind down and decompress before engaging in converation–this is especially true if your child is an introvert or had a hard day.
Just be present and available when they get home so you can feel out if they are ready to talk or not. You will also be there so when they are ready to talk, they can initiate it. You can be doing the dishes or making some food. Something that is productive but it also seems like you are approachable and they will not be disrupting you.
Before you attempt this list, remember triad communication theory. This is especially helpful of males (and it will work on your husband!). You also need to remember time. You will find out more about your child’s life if you spend 60 minutes with her than you will if you spend 6 minutes, no matter how “quality” the time is. On to the questions!
Daily Reflection Questions
- What was the best part of your day?
- Why it works: Encourages gratitude and highlights joy.
- Best for ages: All ages.
- Follow-up: “What made it so great?”
- What was the hardest part of your day?
- Why it works: Builds emotional awareness.
- Best for ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “How did you handle it?”
- Who did you play with today?
- Why it works: Opens a window into friendships.
- Best for ages: Preschool–elementary.
- Follow-up: “What did you play together?”
- What made you smile today?
- Why it works: Centers conversations on joy.
- Best for ages: 3+
- Follow-up: “Why do you think that was funny or sweet?”
- What’s something kind you did for someone today?
- Why it works: Encourages empathy.
- Best for ages: Elementary+
- Follow-up: “How did they respond?”
- What’s something kind someone did for you?
- Why it works: Promotes gratitude.
- Best for ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “How did it make you feel?”
- What did you eat for lunch?
- Why it works: Simple starter for reluctant talkers.
- Best for ages: 3+
- Follow-up: “Who did you sit with?”
- What’s something new you learned today?
- Why it works: Shows interest in school.
- Best for ages: Elementary–teen.
- Follow-up: “Can you show me?”
- What’s something you’re looking forward to tomorrow?
- Why it works: Builds excitement and hope.
- Best for ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “What can we do to get ready for it?”
- What made you feel proud today?
- Why it works: Strengthens confidence.
- Best for ages: Elementary+
- Follow-up: “What effort led to that success?”
School & Learning Questions
- What subject was most fun today?
- Why it works: Highlights school preferences.
- Ages: Elementary–teen.
- Follow-up: “What made it fun?”
- What subject was hardest today?
- Why it works: Identifies challenges.
- Ages: 6+
- Follow-up: “How can I help with that?”
- Did you learn any new words today?
- Why it works: Boosts vocabulary awareness.
- Ages: Elementary.
- Follow-up: “Can you use it in a sentence?”
- Did anything surprise you at school today?
- Why it works: Sparks curiosity and storytelling.
- Ages: All ages.
- Follow-up: “Why was it surprising?”
- Did your teacher say something funny today?
- Why it works: Encourages sharing small moments.
- Ages: Elementary+
- Follow-up: “What did the class do?”
- Did anyone make you laugh today?
- Why it works: Brings out lighthearted stories.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “What was so funny?”
- Was there anything you didn’t understand today?
- Why it works: Opens the door for academic help.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “Let’s figure it out together.”
- Who did you sit next to in class?
- Why it works: Encourages specifics about social life.
- Ages: Elementary–middle.
- Follow-up: “Did you talk to them?”
- What did you do during recess?
- Why it works: Reveals friendships and activities.
- Ages: Elementary.
- Follow-up: “Was it fun or different today?”
- What’s something you wish you had done differently today?
- Why it works: Builds reflection skills.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “What would you do next time?”
Social & Friendship Questions
- Who did you talk to at lunch?
- Why it works: Encourages social sharing.
- Ages: 5+
- Follow-up: “What did you talk about?”
- Did anyone new join your group today?
- Why it works: Encourages noticing inclusion.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “How did they seem to feel?”
- Who made you feel happy today?
- Why it works: Reinforces positive relationships.
- Ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “What did they do?”
- Did anyone need your help today?
- Why it works: Teaches kids to notice others’ needs.
- Ages: Elementary
- Follow-up: “How did you help them?”
- Did you help a friend solve a problem?
- Why it works: Builds problem-solving reflection.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “How did they respond?”
- Did you see anyone being kind today?
- Why it works: Encourages kids to look for goodness.
- Ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “What happened?”
- Did you see anyone being unkind today?
- Why it works: Opens talk about peer struggles.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “What would you have done?”
- Who did you spend the most time with today?
- Why it works: Reveals closest connections.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “What did you do together?”
- Who was the quietest person in class today?
- Why it works: Encourages empathy for others.
- Ages: 8+
- Follow-up: “Why do you think so?”
- Who was the loudest person in class today?
- Why it works: Brings humor and observation.
- Ages: 8+
- Follow-up: “Was it distracting or funny?”
Feelings & Self-Reflection
- What made you feel loved today?
- Why it works: Connects emotions to daily life.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “What else makes you feel loved?”
- Did you feel frustrated today?
- Why it works: Teaches kids to name tough emotions.
- Ages: 5+
- Follow-up: “What helped you feel better?”
- Did anything make you feel scared today?
- Why it works: Opens up hidden worries.
- Ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “What can we do if it happens again?”
- What made you feel excited today?
- Why it works: Reinforces joy and anticipation.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “What are you excited about next?”
- What made you feel tired today?
- Why it works: Connects energy to activities.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “Did you have enough rest?”
- What was the most interesting thing you saw today?
- Why it works: Encourages observation.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “Why do you think it caught your eye?”
- What are you thankful for today?
- What are you thankful for today?
- Why it works: Teaches gratitude.
- Ages: 4+
- Follow-up: “How can you show thanks?
- What made you feel confident today?
- Why it works: Builds self-esteem.
- Ages: Elementary+
- Follow-up: “What helped you succeed?”
- What made you feel creative today?
- Why it works: Celebrates imagination.
- Ages: All
- Follow-up: “What did you make or imagine?”
- What made you feel important today?
- Why it works: Strengthens self-worth.
- Ages: 6+
- Follow-up: “Why did it matter to you?”
Fun & Imaginative Questions
- If you could change one thing about today, what would it be?
- Why it works: Encourages reflection and agency.
- Ages: 6+
- Follow-up: “How would you do it differently?”
- If you could trade places with someone today, who would it be?
- Why it works: Promotes perspective-taking.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “Why them?”
- If you could make a new rule for your class, what would it be?
- Why it works: Sparks creativity and leadership.
- Ages: Elementary+
- Follow-up: “Do you think others would like it?”
- If you could bring one toy to school, what would it be?
- Why it works: Fun and easy entry for younger kids.
- Ages: Preschool–elementary.
- Follow-up: “What would you do with it?”
- If you could describe your day as a weather forecast, what would it be?
- Why it works: Fun metaphor that builds expression skills.
- Ages: 7+
- Follow-up: “Why that weather?
- What was the best thing that happened today?
- What was the worst thing that happened today?
- What was the hardest thing you had to do today?
- What made you laugh today?
- What did you read today? What was read to you today?
- Who do you love to play with during playtime?
- Who would you want to sit by in class?
- Who would you want to NOT sit by in class?
- What is the biggest difference between this year and last year?
- What did you do at recess today?
- What part of school is your favorite (if it isn’t school, what part of dance, what song, what part of soccer, etc.)
- Tell me the names of three children you sat by today.
- What was something interesting or funny your teacher/coach said today?
- What rules does your teacher/coach say are important?
- What is something interesting about your teacher/coach?
- What is your favorite time of day at school?
- What are you looking forward to about tomorrow?
- Did you get frustrated with anything at school today?
- Were you able to finish all of your work/tasks today?
- Tell me a new word you heard today?
- What made you happy today?
- Did anything make you sad today?
- How did you help somebody today?
- How did someone help you today?
- Were you ever bored today?
- Who would you like to play with that you have never played with before?
- What word did your teacher say the most today?
- What would you like to learn more about?
- What would you like to learn less about?
- How were you a good friend today?
- Where did you play the most at recess?
- Did anyone do anything nice for you today?
- Was it noisy or quiet during class today? Which do you like better?
- Ask about a specific friend your child has.
- What questions did you ask today?
- Tell me what you learned today that you didn’t ever know?
- On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your day? How could you make it a 10?
- If you got one wish granted about school, what would it be?
- Who is the funniest person in your class? How is he/she funny?
- What is your favorite part of lunch?
- What challenged you the most today?
- If you got to be the teacher tomorrow, what would you do?
- If you could trade seats with anyone, who would it be and why?
- Tell me about three different times you used your pencil today at school.
- What do you like the most about school?
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This post first appeared on this blog in August of 2017